


Lost in investigation

by Melitot



Category: The Mentalist
Genre: Angst, But before too, Comfort, Drabble Collection, Drama, Drama & Romance, Episode Tag, F/M, Falling In Love, Flash Fic, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, I'll love this series forever, Loads of Angst, Love, Marriage, Partners to Lovers, Police, Post Red John, Romance, Serial Killers, Tragedy, Understanding, Weddings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-19
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-16 00:13:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7244479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melitot/pseuds/Melitot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>Some days he'd like to lie in that room, inside that empty house, and never open his eyes again.</i><br/>-<br/><i>They smile at each other and see the persons they were, and they marvel at the road they traveled, at the advertities they conquered. Had anyone told them, that first day at the CBI...</i><br/><i>It's a miracle.</i><br/>Patrick, Teresa and distances that seem insurmontable, but can perhaps be overcome. And, eventually, they are.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Faithful shadow

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Lost in investigation](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7169489) by [Melitot Proud Eye (Melitot)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melitot/pseuds/Melitot%20Proud%20Eye). 



> I started posting this collection back in 2012, and thought it complete until I started re-watching TM a couple of weeks ago. Now I've begun writing new drabbles and decided to translate them, too. First time i try drabbles and flashfics in English!  
> The title was inspired by the movie _Lost in translation_.  
>  Hope you like! And don't hesitate to point out typos or mistakes if you see any ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The doctor mentioned is the one from episode 4x18, _The red mile_.  
>  Prompt: The Mentalist, Patrick, Death hounds him.

 

And so it goes, so works the world...

( _His_.)

Death follows him in every shape, courting him with dedication, and with every step Patrick is a little more arid, a little more desperate. Some days he'd like to lie in that room, inside that empty house, and never open his eyes again. Then the fury smoldering beneath the surface reawakens and he gets up, to disperse his pain upon others anew.

But he cannot bear the doctor a grudge for asking him to live more death: his dignified end is what he would have wanted for–

 

While She takes him away, silently, Patrick stays and stares into the void, immersed in the dark.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words: 114.


	2. Convergence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tag ep. 4x07.

 

An instant, a dizzy spell, and his entire world is reduced to the camera's red dot. It's immersed in the quints' half-light – it calls to him, like a lighthouse lying in wait among the rocks. He's been here once, he thinks. That flashing punctuated another night of his life, when he didn't know yet and let stupid words kill two innocents. But now Patrick _knows_. And he knows that John, wherever he is, will always follow his appearances.

(He suspects the bastard is nostalgic.)

He teeters on the chasm. Karen catches his attentions, wants a speech.

The warmth of the challenge suffuses him. The professor stares at him, sure, and the choice is made: a killer for a killer.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words: 122


	3. Messages

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tag 4x11, Always bet on red.  
> When I was still seriously fearing for Jane's life :/

 

"Killing the man who murdered our daughter is the best thing I will ever do..."

At those words Teresa knows the letter is fake, like all the evidence that solved the case. And, not for the first time, she feels conflicted. They're Jane's words – his most intimate thoughts. Oh, what should she do? It's not good, she told him, that lording over the rules of his; but how can she not become his accomplice when, behind vengeance, she sees misery and desperation?

(Those eyes – don't let her see them anymore.)

(Don't take them away.)

 

A dead man's letter will never be of comfort to her. _So_ , she thinks, _I won't let you die_.

 

 


	4. Weakness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tag episode 4x24.

 

A soft heart, Teresa. Hard words and a soft heart, as always.

Hearing his name after six months and knowing where he is, in the end, are more important matters than his charge of indictment. (Assault, fraud, alcohol, resistance – oh, for heaven's sake.)

You force yourself not to react. You already offered him all the help you could, you say.

And you find out you have more nonetheless. Maybe it will always be like this, until it's too late. You leave the team behind and want to run to him for another chance.

The worst thing is, he will know, when you meet.

 

Or perhaps it is the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words: 110.


	5. Point of no return

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had the mixed pain and luck to see the episode 6x01 when the second was already out, so I didn't fear for Lisbon's safety too long. Boy, I'd have gone crazy if I'd watched it just when it was aired D:  
> Still a nice, angsty moment. Patrick's face...

 

You answer, smile, and your world stops at that voice.

Crumbles, again.

" _Sorry, Patrick. Teresa can't come to the phone right now..._ "

You cannot breathe. The phone burns against your cheek, reflects a heat you haven't got within anymore. Suddenly you're alone in limbo of pain and uncertainty, with your ghosts and Death's voice gifting you with another horror.

Your fault.

He's got her, you think, again and again.

(And the last words you and Teresa exchanged were accusations, oh god.)

 

He's got her, and you'll never see her again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words: 96.


	6. Graced

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tag episode 6x02, obviously :)

 

He spared her, and you cannot understand why.

Red John let what was already a victim go, marked with blood. It's neither a miracle nor chance, you know that.

You're afraid to look for the reasons, because you see how you look at her and how you follow, how you touch her while she's in a hospital bed, just awake (gift of God gift of John of chance of a justice in which you didn't believe anymore–)

How you're increasingly close to her, in body and mind.

She's the only one whom you fully trust. The only one who can see the truth.

You're afraid, because John spared her and your match's end will come.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words: 121.


	7. Everything flows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter's title refers to Eraclitus' _"panta rei"_.

 

Teresa smiles. You smile back and something echoes inside your chest.

You remember and, in the space of an instant, you realize how much things have changed. Gone are the secrets and the jealosy with which you guarded your ventures. Now you wait for her in the office and lead her where, before, you would have gone alone; you take her aside and explain, tell her about your discoveries, your intuitions. (Your fears.)

You tell her everything – she knows about _that list_.

You love having her at your side.

You wonder what you'd do today without her, and how deeply she knows your heart.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words: 100.


	8. For love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tag 6x06.  
> Angsty it might have been, but gosh the sunset scene.

 

They're already upon the cliff, immersed in a sunset of light and soul, when he realizes what he's doing. (Not what he feels, oh, no, _that_ –)

He will betray her.

He holds her tight, tight, and he would never let her go. In his arms she's as solid as rock, an anchor in the storm. He doesn't remember how they reached this point; he remembers a time, not too long ago, in which the mere thought of the risk would have had him retreat. But it's very true that living heals.

He holds his breath not to tell her the truth. This is goodbye.

And he would not let her go, he would answer her eyes' desperate desire and stay.

Forever.

 


End file.
